Saturday, August 21, 2021

The Real Truth About Vaccines


Buckle up, darlings! Our guest today is an authentic anti-masker on a recent thread. Uppercase segments and redundant punctuation are retained to indicate sincerity:

    Why should I deprive myself of my God given human rights? Why should I deprive myself of oxygen, increase my carbon dioxide levels and re-breathe the toxins I've just exhaled? Why should I lower my immune system and make myself sick?
    This is outright tyranny, manipulation and control of others. You have zero evidence to back up your claims and have done zero research. The mask wearers are leading us all into stupidity, slavery, and sickness.
    The fact is that this virus has a 99.9% survival rate and that is what people need to focus on. More people die every day of many other things. Death and sickness is part of life, you have to learn to live with it.
    This "vaccine" is not the normal vaccine, it's GENE THERAPY, this means your genetic blueprint can be MANIPULATED and CHANGED. This "vaccine" is still in clinical trials and therefore EXPERIMENTAL, which is ILLEGAL to both roll out without informed consent and against the Nuremberg Code. We have a legal and ethical RIGHT to BODILY AUTONOMY. I could go on and on. The SURVIVAL RATE IS 99.9%!!!! More people die of the shit sold in the supermarket!!!!!!!
 
Okay, okay, Petunia, calm down--you're hyperventilating, and that might be the whole problem right there. Put a bag over your nose and mouth and...no? Well. Let's take these points one at a time. Because the real problem is nothing you say is true.

First, your God-given human rights. God never said you didn't have to mask up. In fact, in Exodus 33:23, God said "Thou shalt see my back parts: but my face shall not be seen." You sound young, Sweet Pea. May we see your back parts?

Next. Nobody's increasing your carbon dioxide levels or forcing you to re-breathe toxins you've exhaled. What have you been eating? What we're actually doing with the masks is mandating them as a carbon collection system to mitigate global warming. Once our masks are saturated with carbon we can drop them in the ocean. It's either this or we're coming for your hamburgers--your choice. BTW butt masks are next.

Mask wearers are not leading us into slavery. You're all mixed up. The phrase is "Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us some takeout," and that's where the slaves come in. They're just gateway slaves now, racing around town in their little cars trying to patch together a living out of the gig economy, with no benefits, pensions, or health insurance, but we can see where this is headed, and it's nowhere good.

About that zero evidence. Close to zero, sure, but we have administered 4.3 billion doses of vaccine worldwide so far, and some data are trickling in. Data? That means the raw bits of information with which we can draw reasonable conclusions. It's sort of like the stuff you use to conclude COVID has a 99.9% survival rate, or that vaccines lower your immunity, only in your case it's not "data," it's "bullshit."

I'm surprised you didn't mention the tracking devices we're putting in the vaccines. That's for real. But we're not tracking people like you, Peanut! We're monitoring the agents at the border so we can maximize illegal entry of future Democratic voters, ultimately achieving the goal of having more people to redistribute other people's wealth to. We also should be able to discover the optimum times to spike trees and blow up pipelines. We're planning to repurpose those, by the way. We're visualizing them filled with CBD oil, and underplanted with small labor-intensive artisanl arugula plots in a mixed-vegetation permaculture environment. You're going to love it.

Also, before you bring it up, we would never work with China to make a virus! Not until they promise to raise wages and quit using coal. Now, we have invested in bat conservation.

So. About the vaccines not being normal. True. Used to be we had to get someone to scrape scabs off cowpox victims or gather secretions from coughing and vomiting children and grow our antigens in chicken eggs just to get our vaccines ginned up, but now we can't get enough migrant scab-scrapers willing to do the jobs we don't want to do. Could be they'll come around once we lose all our crops to drought, but in the meantime, these modern mRNA vaccines that don't involve pathogens at all are really getting pretty slick.

None of this involves manipulating your genes, but if it did, I have some cool ideas. Maybe you could grow wool! You could shear yourself in the summer and wear yourself in the winter!

I'm not saying you don't make some good points. You said you "could go on and on"--absolutely true. And people do die of other things all the time. You could turn your head for one moment to scowl at a mask-wearer and bam get hit by a bus! Wouldn't that be something?

As to why you should deprive yourself of oxygen, well...there are some things to be said for that.

Meanwhile, rest assured clinical trials have been conducted and monitoring continues apace. In fact, you're in the control group, Sugar Pants. Good luck!

76 comments:

  1. I like the idea of growing my own wool. No more wardrobe malfunctions.

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    1. I met a guy once who looked like he was wearing a sweater naked. It wasn't as appealing as you might think. Now, if he could've managed a cable knit...

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    2. Did you suggest full body Nair to him? That stuff is very stinky.

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  2. I am really angry and resentful of these anti-vaxxers. It's because of them that these variants can emerge. If it were just they who died from Covid, I'd say, fine, Sugar, don't get vaccinated. We could use fewer people in the red states. But if a variant springs out of this that doesn't respond to the vaccine... then WTF do we do? Maybe we should stop giving them hospital beds if they are unvaccinated and just the fuck let them die already.

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    1. They are already looking at that option in Texas.

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    2. I read about a doctor... I think it was in Alabama... who won't take unvaccinated patients after September 1. They either have to get vaccinated or find another doctor. He said that he's tired of having patients die a horrible death that could so easily have been prevented.

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    3. That surprises me. Although I guess doctors can refuse patients for all sorts of reasons.

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    4. Well, since they can refuse to perform abortions, which is "your body, your choice", why shouldn't they also be allowed to refuse patients who won't be vaccinated (which I've seen hold up signs saying "my body, my choice." I applaud him for this choice -- especially in a red state.

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    5. As the Medical System is near collapse and not enough Beds for other Emergencies that weren't preventable, I foresee Hospitals and Doctors having to make this choice to reserve resources for the more deserving. After all, if you aren't on Board for the Science, the Vaccine or Masking, why even go to the Hospital once you get the Rona, just stay Home, ride it out and mebbe you will make it in spite of your own ignorance and defiance... if not, at least you won't be Infecting any more people trying to do the Right thing during a Deadly Plague.

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    6. The greatest irony, to me (well, probably not the *greatest* irony, but pretty great), is rat-licking vax-refuseniks who GO TO THE HOSPITAL when they are in the throes of COVID-induced agony, rather than staying home and smugly developing some natural immunity. And if it isn't quite what they had anticipated, well, as they were so anxious to point out: they were bound to die of something, right?

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  3. Someone get me a bus schedule, so I can watch.

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  4. It seems to me that so many people have worked very hard for their ignorance they just hate to give it up. If it didn't potentially harm so many others I would want to let natural selection carry on with no interference.

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    1. There is definitely a big resistance in most of us for admitting we're wrong. Might even be worse the wronger one is.

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  5. So sad, we could have acquired herd immunity; now we may receive thinning of the herd.

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    1. I wonder who is behind all the misinformation, and I wonder why. Yesterday I read someone's comment to the effect that polio and smallpox were both developed by humans.

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    2. I read that 73% of the disinformation about the vaccines was traced to 12 sources across various social media, mostly FaceBook. 95% of these posts were NOT removed. Since most people these days seem to get their "news" from FaceBook (I like to call these people FUCKING IDIOTS!!!) and FaceBook works on an algorithm that only shows you what you already believe, well, do the math. Shit like this makes me want to just bang my head against a wall.

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    3. Don't do that--there might not be room at the hospital for you!

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    4. Pfft... The LAST place I'd want to be now would be in a hospital! They're full of SICK people!

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    5. Well, some Gene Pools clearly need to be thinned and Mother Nature doesn't suffer Fools well... neither do I... so I'm past having any compassion for Covidiots.

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    6. I read a couple weeks ago, in the Sunday NYT about the hostility that the vaccinated have toward the unvaccinated. I was like, damn! I thought I was the only one (because I'm just generally crotchety.) BTW-- I like the term "Covidiots." I'm gonna use that!

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  6. Whew! This was fairly dripping with sarcasm, but Sugar Pants certainly had it coming! I laughed out loud at butt-masks and shearing ourselves in the summer to wear ourselves in the winter hahahaha, I need to go back & reread this!! Just the pickup we needed, thank you Murr :^)

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  7. this virus has a 99.9% survival rate

    Nope. As of the end of July there were (in the US) 610,000 deaths out of 35 million cases, or one in 57, which is a survival rate of a little better than 98%. Not acceptable odds when what's at stake is a horrible death. Plus, many of those who survive are left with severe "long covid" symptoms which, for all we can tell, may last a lifetime (some involve brain damage). And that's with the old "classic" covid-19. The death rate for the delta variant will likely be much worse.

    your genetic blueprint can be MANIPULATED and CHANGED

    Nope, the vaccine uses messenger RNA to cause your system to manufacture virus spike proteins (which, unlike complete viruses, are not dangerous) for your immune system to react to, so it is trained to respond quickly to infections of the actual virus later. It doesn't do anything to the DNA in your cell nuclei which make up your "genetic blueprint", nor can it. Also, the J&J vaccine is a traditional vaccine, not an mRNA vaccine.

    This guy's idea of "research" seems to be reading Facebook posts written by the kind of people who believe Noah's ark was real but the Moon landing wasn't.

    Note that it's the South, where large numbers of people believe this nonsense, that is now having its hospitals overwhelmed with dying idiots who refused to be vaccinated, while nurses are quitting in droves because they can no longer stand being worked half to death for the sake of people to stupid to protect themselves.

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    1. Yeah, I've quit explaining all that. Now I'm just going to tell them the vaccines prevent hair loss and erectile dysfunction.

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    2. Fuck them. I've always thought we needed more chlorine in the gene pool. And fewer people, for sure. Just let 'em die. I'm tired of masking (in some places) so that people who declined the vaccine will be safe. In December, when I will be eligible for the booster, I'm gettin' it MOFO! I don't CARE if they are safe! Oooo... this whole subject gets me steaming! It's like, were you all born stupid, or did your mamas drop you on your heads?

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    3. I was wondering when I was supposed to get the booster. Seems like a person could just waltz in any old time, but I'd like to follow recommendations (which might be based on getting certain people boosted first). Anyone know?

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    4. Yes! They say that you should get the booster 8 months after your last shot. For me and Paul that takes it to the last weeks of December, since we finished our shots in late April. The boosters should be coming out in September, so it depends on when you got the vaccine in the first place. (I JUST turned 65 a day after everyone 50 and up could get it instead of just those over 65. I was a little irked. I would have liked to have gotten it much sooner.)

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    5. tell them the vaccines prevent hair loss and erectile dysfunction

      Not even really untrue in the latter case. Those "long covid" permanent after-effects of surviving a severe case do, in men, sometimes include chronic dongwilt -- and the vaccines mostly prevent covid, or at least prevent it from becoming severe.

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    6. So, is the booster different from a regular shot? For that matter, is Shot Two different from Shot One? I guess we'd be due right around Thanksgiving.

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    7. I don't even care at this point. If Fauchi says it's a good idea, I'm in! And in any case, not having to wear a mask is wonderful! (For ME, and FUCK the unvaccinated!)

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    8. Actually, it's easy to get a booster anytime. You have to lie about who you are and whether you have insurance, and just tell him this is your first shot. They're not required to get any information from you other than whatever name you come up with. Not that I would ever do such a thing, but I've had friends who did.

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    9. Infidel753's mention of 'dongwilt' that is priceless, will have to remember that one! Besides, these people shouldn't be breeding, you can't fix Stupid.

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  8. That my friend is a choice he made for his self n he will have to live with his consequences because doctors through time have treated patients because they needed treatment not for religious or racial stuff - you put aside your pettiness for your profession or get the hell out ! It’s that simple - ppl have a right not to put in there bodies crap ��! Like it or not ppl - if they choose to die there way then so be it ! You also have a right to jab if you so choose n take what risks is given because with anything these days you take a risks at eating anywhere with toxic foods they’ve been planting with chemicals to poison us but ok on forcing ppl right ? Not all of us are stupid ppl about not basking up but not getting the jab I do makes up I use my gloves if needed i try to be as cautious as I can to try not get this - but - the fact is , not enough research is done to know what’s truly right - clearly we see this if you don’t then question that - it’s our bodies our choices - stop �� thinking all are idiots about wearing what we need but it crosses the line on mandating a job or shot ! Totally ! We are not a communist country but I feel we have crossed the line when you order ppl that to have a job it requires this that’s an experiment �� really country ? That’s the best you could come up with ? Tell the truth. Come out on what you want n expect n let it go from there my truth

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    1. I wish I didn't waste this line before... but: were you just born stupid or did your mama drop you on your head???

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    2. It seems a safe bet that this person is unvaccinated -- and I seem to remember mentioning something up above about brain damage being one of the possible long-term effects of covid-19.

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    3. *Sigh* These are the zombies that The Walking Dead has been preparing me for all this time....

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    4. That person sounds a lot like my sister who lives in Santa Clarita, California.

      She is a trumpista and does all of her own research.
      She doesn't like Mexican people so probably she is living in the wrong place.
      She and her long time boyfriend fantasize about moving to Kentucky where the people are more like them.
      But that will never happen because he won't divorce his wife. Think about that.

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    5. Honestly, Richard, I don't know what that person sounds like. I don't even know where she stands. It is that incoherent.

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    6. Incoherence makes the world go round, ppl (pacific power and light).

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    7. She sounds a lot like most of the other anti-vaxxers I've heard from.

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    8. Yep, these be the Zombies the Walking Dead has been preparing us for all the time! And I agree with Infidel, sounds like serious brain damage going on right there, there isn't a coherent thought in the Rant, is it even a Real Person or a Troll Bot trying to pretend to be a Real Person? LMAO

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    9. If that was a real person, our education system is in even worse shape than I thought. Grammar? Punctuation? Spelling? And FFS, how about siting credible data to support your claims? And -- and this may be WAY too much to hope for from such a dimwit -- how about some wit or a few bon mots thrown in? If these people would be able to make me laugh WITH them instead of AT them, they would be much more convincing. So it's probably a good thing that they are so obviously stupid.

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    10. The race war Trump promised his sTRUMPets is the idol upon whose altar they will gladly sacrifice their children, their parents, and themselves. Oh wait a sec, I think I've said that before...

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  9. You have outdone yourself, Murr. This is priceless. My favorite Sugar Pants line is this one: "Death and sickness is part of life, you have to learn to live with it." Has a Yogi Berra ring to it.

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    1. Oh haha thank you. It does have a Yogi Berra sound.

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    2. I transcribed, and edited for brevity. Did not make any of that up.

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  10. Thanks, Murr. At least i will know that i was not the only one.
    I have had it right up to the gills with these idiots.

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    1. I need to work "gills" into my discourse more often. [jotting note]

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  11. Huh. I'm surprised to hear that DNA manipulation thing is still making the rounds. Idiots.

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    1. There's Gegnomes involved. It's very sneaky.

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    2. They probably misspelled 'genomes." As if they would even know what that was.

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  12. Thoroughly tired of idiotic arguments.
    The writer mentions the Nuremberg Code, but clearly does not know what that is.

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    1. I'm also a little distressed about claims of slavery and tyranny and oppression in a world that is not short on examples of the real thing. What a country!

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  13. I got the booster. I went into the pharmacy and said I had recently completed a course of radiation therapy for skin cancer on my nose (true) and she said fine, step right up. I called Rich and said, hey, come over here, and all he had to do was stand there and look vaguely limp and she said, "As long as you're here..." Here in Michigan they seem perfectly willing to administer it really without much question. We were previously vaccinated in January so close to 8 months out anyway. Same Pfizer vaccine as first two, same 6 hours of general malaise on the second day and popped right up to be around the Littles, who start masked kindergarten next week. VERY happy to have it. The problem with petunias is that they need constant dead-heading. Very high maintenance.

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  14. Natural Selection will deal with the Petunia's of the World, Darwinism accelerated I suspect. Sounds like she deprived herself of a bunch of Oxygen some other kind of way, or perhaps she was just born lacking active Brain Cells, who knows, some Herds just aren't gonna make it, I suspect she's gonna be in that .1% she speaks of that the Rona takes out? Well, at least she's Saving her Vaccine dose for some deserving underprivileged Soul in some 3rd World Country that would actually take it and be grateful not to Die horribly... well, that is, if we don't let it expire and throw it away waiting on the Petunia's of the World to wise the fuck up.

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    1. Biden's under some criticism for recommending boosters when we could be distributing doses around the world.

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    2. Right now, numerous countries are dumping about-to-expire vaccines because of all of the Petunias who are squealing "not in my body." It sounds like really poor logistics that these are not getting fast enough to countries where they are in short supply and people can't get a first. I would much rather my booster go there. But if it's just going to expire while waiting for someone to decide if it is altering their DNA and magnetizing them- then I'm happy to have my booster. https://www.bmj.com/content/374/bmj.n1893

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    3. p.s. We have distributed more vaccines to countries in need than any other and Biden continues to do so.

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    4. I'm just glad you got yours, personally!

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  15. I have given up on trying to figure out which ones actually believe the nonsense they spew, and which ones just use it to signal that they are with the sTRUMPets, as a cheer to egg each other and themselves on to greater and greater rage and eventual violence, just like shouts of “Sieg heil!”

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    1. At least some of them will die from Covid, others will get "dongwilt" (Thank you for that term, Infidel!) and be unable to procreate... so hopefully we will have fewer of them around. *The Beach Boys "Wouldn't It Be Nice" as a background earworm.*

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    2. Not enough of them, I suspect.

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  16. I found the naked, decomposing body of my brother last Monday. He was an anti-vaxer and he died of COVID. If I could expunge the sight and smell of that discovery, I would then embed it into all of those who believe they have the right to walk around unvaccinated and contaminate the rest of us. Someone killed my brother with COVID, and I only hope he died before killing someone else.

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    1. condolences on so many levels.

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    2. Wow... dude... I'm sorry for you. I know my comments come off as hostile -- because they are; I'm exasperated with the science-deniers. But I really feel for the people who love them and who cannot help them... because in the end, no one can help us but ourselves. So sorry.

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    3. My condolences Shawn, words are inadequate.

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  17. Oregon Health Authority has a list of conditions for a booster shot, a friend got her booster shot today. Data on clinical trials may be out by September 2021.

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    1. Yup, just read that on my Kaiser site--I think I'll wait for a bit until they offer it to me, because I'm pretty sure others should go first.

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  18. Since everyone knows masks don't work, we should let the medical staff in on this.

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