Wednesday, May 12, 2021

Do You Kuru?


I haven't heard much about Hillary Clinton lately. Maybe she's had something to say from time to time, but she's certainly not front and center in the news anymore. This doesn't alarm me all that much. She's kind of old-school. She's one of those traditional politicians who, when they lose an election, accept the result graciously and fade into the background. As we now know, there is no reason to concede an election, no matter what, but that's a recent discovery.

So maybe I was never going to be the first to notice that she no longer exists at all. Thanks to Q-Anon, who unlike Hillary totally exists, we know that Hillary Clinton was executed following a tribunal some three years ago. It's the kind of thing you'd think would make the news cycle, at least if it didn't drop on a Friday night, but that's the thing about tribunals: they're super duper secret. A properly done tribunal and execution should produce no evident body. Have you seen a body? You have not. So there: ipso fucto. Tribunal. Execution.

I'm still a little suspicious, and so is Cirsten Weldon, the actress famous for playing the agent's girlfriend in a thirty-year-old film called "Hard To Die," so she should know. She does agree that HIllary Clinton is dead but says it happened more recently, when she died of Stage Four Kuru. Kuru is a very rare brain-wasting disease but the famous have ways of getting things that regular people can't. Basically, you have to eat infected people's brains, so if that isn't elitist, I don't know what is. The last time anyone was known to have contracted kuru was ten years ago when a bunch of people in Papua New Guinea got it from eating the brains of dead people. So cannibalism is definitely involved, which lends the entire story a lot more credence than that tribunal bullshit.

Because, after all, it is already widely accepted in certain unvaccinated sectors that Hilary is among a cabal of liberals who run a child-molestation ring out of a pizza parlor, and pedophilia, especially if enhanced with pizza, is well-known to be a gateway disorder to cannibalism. You're going to want to examine those toppings very carefully. So all of this rings true already, but there's the added information that Clinton and her cronies have been eating children for a while now as a Satanic ritual. She's eaten lots of children. You can tell because they went straight to her ankles. 
 
Supposedly this is a way of harvesting adrenochrome, a magic substance that can keep you young. Liberals will do anything, including affecting ponytails and advancing socialism and otherwise caring about humanity, to stay young. Adrenochrome is produced in terrified children, so you could torture them and scoop it from their pituitary glands or their blood if you don't want to eat them. The Jews have been doing just that for generations, while keeping Kosher, in case you have any lingering doubts about the practice. There's not a story out there so outlandish that it doesn't get more true-ish by being Jewish.

Anyway, that's why no one has seen Hillary Clinton lately, and also her friend Huma Abedin, and also John Podesta, and also James Comey, and also George Soros. And if anyone claims to have seen any of these people, ask yourself: would a known torturer and cannibal stop short of lying? That's rich. If you think you have seen them, they are clones. Clones created at or near the time of their own birth, in Hillary's case 1947, so they're the right age and everything. You need to be super smart and devious to think that far ahead. You probably need to be Jewish.

What's clear is that there is now an epidemic of brain-wasting disease. And that Original Hillary no longer exists.

Her emails, now, they're around here somewhere.

24 comments:

  1. Actually, what I heard is that these Q-Anon people have been transported to THIS time from the Middle Ages, but they don't realize it. So they still hold the same ideas, and think of Science as the work of the Devil. It certainly does explain their beliefs. I hope that Science somehow finds a way to send these poor people back to their own time period. If I've learned anything from Doctor Who, it's that one can cause a lot of trouble messing about in someone else's time period.

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    1. I've still never seen Dr. Who. Or Star Wars, for that matter.

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    2. That would explain the medieval-quality anti-semitism nicely.

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  2. Nothing we can say about the Q crowd will be any loonier than what they actually believe.

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    1. Yeah, I didn't really make anything up, here.

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  3. pedophilia, especially if enhanced with pizza, is well-known to be a gateway disorder to cannibalism

    I know Washington is somewhat notorious for wild parties, but this sounds kind of over-the-top. Also, the QAnon qrackpots are forgetting that our side believes in medical science. If this were really going on, everyone involved would be vaccinated against kuru.

    Those Jewish people are certainly energetic. I don't know how they find the time to manage all these Satanic rituals and cloned politicians when you'd think they'd be busy recharging their space lasers for the next fire season.

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    1. That's what makes them inscrutable. You can't scrute with them.

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    2. I'm pretty sure you've been scruting with them. They just don't know it yet.

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  4. Who knew that insanity and fear were so prevalent?

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    1. The sheer numbers are startling, I'll give you that. You'd think it would be just a few random schizophrenics postulating in the dark, but...

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  5. It's really not so very farther out than the far-out beliefs a lot of people have had for centuries regarding the existence of one or more supernatural intervening gods that not only has a Plan for You, but Is On It. I'm pretty convinced that Homo sapiens NEEDS a plethora of superstitious conspiracy beliefs to function.

    And to quote a quote -- thanks for using the word 'plethora.' It means a lot

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  6. I was looking for someone to add the Kreuzfeld-Jacob disease into this gobbledegook.So far...no one.

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    1. That would be too difficult for Q-anon-ers to read or to spell.

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    2. I don't think kuru and K-J are the same thing exactly--at least that's what's in my head.

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  7. Have I not already mentioned the cracked pot who swore to me, with an absolutely straight face that these 'so-called' Covid victims have actually been murdered by their doctors because "the devil is giving them satisfaction for the killing of the peoples". I don't think she's heard of Q-Anon. I just think the stoopid is running swift and deep, well maybe not swift, but as a species we have outstripped our capacity to come up with quasi-rational god-like theories and are turning to simply spinning the wheel of idiocracy and combining whatever three incompatible psychotic tendencies show up.

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  8. Bulletin from DC: I saw Hillary just today, when I went by Comet Pizza to pick up a large pizza for my Muslim friends who are celebrating that satanic ritual, eid al fitr tonight. In addition to Hillary, John Podesta was behind the counter, running the pituitary glands of previously-tortured children through the meat slicer, making adrenochrome toppings for the pizzas. So be assured that all is well, here in DC!

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  9. I think I'll just back away quietly.

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    1. She disposed of a kid somewhere along the way.... to Hilary? Hmmm, Perhaps Dr Zuma is involved in the cabal

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    2. We shall never know. Should I leave it up?

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