Saturday, February 22, 2020

United We Can't Stand

We're living in contentious times. Concerted efforts have been made to divide us in any way possible, for all sorts of purposes. Libertarian billionaires have funded Astroturf movements like the Tea Party to keep us squabbling with each other instead of banding together with pitchforks. Russian oligarchs have flooded us with disinformation to discourage voters or split votes in order to build their own power. Newscasters fan the flames because there's money in it for them. And, of course, sometimes a single man might wedge us apart simply because he likes to call people doody-pantses and get crowds roaring, because it gives him a little woodie again. Ah, nostalgia! There's all kinds of reasons to make us One Nation, Divisible.

So we must look for ways to bridge the gaps between us, and celebrate those areas where we still have common ground.

For instance, nobody much likes vegans.

We just don't. We don't really mind a lot of the other diets. They're so easy to make fun of. They eat only grapefruit. Or algae pellets. Or bacon. There's always a justification.  This diet aligns with the stomach contents of a perfectly sound frozen person who died of old age 10,000 years ago. That diet makes your urine crystals line up with the magnetic field. The other diet stimulates your metabolism in the morning, your chakras at noon, and your balls at night.

We think vegetarians are silly but sort of cute. But vegans? Man. They're just too extreme. They think they're better than we are. And if there's anything we can't stand, it's other people thinking they're better than we are, even if they are. Some people hate it so much, they even throw in with Donald Trump, who is a pus-filled waste of carbon.

Vegans choose their food and clothing and other things on principle. And principles are annoying as hell, in other people. Principles don't just sit on the sidelines. They accuse. We want to mock vegans. We want to poke them with a fork and speculate on how well-marbled they are.

Vegans will not partake of animals or animal products or consider animals a commodity in any way. Some vegans particularly revile factory-farming because of its unspeakable cruelty. Others emphasize the dire consequences to the planet of the whole system of animal agriculture. In the face of these strong, unassailable points, it is incumbent upon the rest of us to catch vegans stepping on bugs and accuse them of rank hypocrisy.

Because they're clearly out of control. For instance, good vegans avoid standard vaccines because chicken eggs are used to incubate their viruses. Lots and lots and lots of chicken eggs. There are ways to make vaccines that use cells from insects instead, which, technically, are animals. This is what the wise vegan would opt for, as opposed to forgoing vaccines, because it is not a perfect world and an insect is assumed to be a few notches less suffery than a chicken.

Not photo-edited. Dave didn't hold the camera steady.
You can make fun of this view if you want, but I won't join you. The vast majority of vegans are people who do not shy away from ethical dilemmas and who educate themselves about the fallout of their actions and conduct themselves accordingly. This is the mark of a grownup. Mocking vegans as scolds who don't want anybody to have any fun is totally toddler territory. That said, I had a flu shot, and so I believe a chicken has contributed to my well-being this year, and is liable to contribute to my plate this week.

I eat less meat all the time. You could call me a Flexitarian. Or just plain chicken. But I'm a work in progress.

I did hear that Sebastian Gorka, a former Trump aide and conservative bile factory, thundered "They want to take away your hamburgers! This is what Stalin dreamed about but never achieved!" Well, I swan. Ol' Sebass, there, might finally make a vegan out of me. Here's a tip. As soon as you hear people yelling about taking away your hamburgers, or your pickup trucks, or your guns, or your light bulbs, or your toilet, know this: that person really wants to take away your health care, your pension, your wages, and your Social Security. Screw them and pass the yams.

32 comments:

  1. Call me paranoid (Lord knows I'm the first one to admit to it), but part of me thinks that the reason that smart phones have been made so ubiquitous -- ALMOST necessary -- is so that the population will be too distracted with FaceBook and cute cat videos to rise up against the rich. And it doesn't help that the majority of people get their news from FaceBook, of all places, which only gives you news that your algorithm says you agree with.

    Plus, I think that people don't mess with the rich because Americans don't think of themselves as poor... they think of themselves as just one lucky lottery ticket away from being rich themselves. Which is why they don't teach math anymore: people might realize the astronomical chances against their winning and actually save their money. (See, everything comes back to my paranoia!)

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  2. I think EVERYBODY should get the news that my algorithm says I agree with. Can we make that happen?

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  3. Having studied a little comparative dental stuff as a long ago biology student, I concluded that we are omnivores and designed to eat whatever is edible. So I do that unless I have to close my eyes or hold my nose to do it.
    Next they'll want to take our god-given right to drive gas guzzling vehicles. I am sure there is a Wholly Babble verse to justify driving them. I am sure Jeezus had an opinion about it.

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    1. Ooo. That would be a good name for a big ole car. The Ford Omnivore. PS If you studied my teeth, you'd conclude I am a Jellovore.

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    2. I still laugh about your Ford Extortion.

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  4. Silly but sort of cute? Why thank you. I edge closer to being a scary vegan all the time. But cheese. Cheese is hard to surrender.

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  5. I admire the heck out of vegans, and vegetarians, and those who are trying to get there. It's not an easy stance, as you point out. But if we all just lean toward it, it doesn't matter if we're perfect; collective effort means something, something good for our planet. I get frustrated by my own GI system, which gets easily overwhelmed by fibre. But I still try.

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    1. You're supposed to poop. If you don't poop, overwhelming happens.

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    2. When you poop too much too fast it's overwhelming too, trust me :)

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    3. Oh THAT kind of overwhelming. Right. You should just be normal whelming.

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  6. I try not to castigate anyone for one's beliefs - even, mentally. I acknowledge the challenge I face, however, in keeping to myself the ways in which some believers act/espouse in inconsistent ways. (I'm the only hypocrite allowed in my world!)

    For the life of me, I see no difference in exploiting animals to feed myself and in exploiting plants to feed myself. They are all living things.

    That said, I certainly understand the difference we can make to climate by our actions. The basic reason we humans are changing the climate is that there are too many of us to be able to live as we wish to live. By being vegan, we allow for more humans. The same effect could be had by ridding ourselves of pet animals. Just think of the effect that (especially the four-legged variety of) pets have on the climate.
    Cop Car

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    1. Yeah, it's a quantity thing. Too many of us, and we eat way more meat than people used to. If we all had to take down our meat by slingshot, the climate would be better off.

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  7. I remember several years ago when grand daughter brought home a new boyfriend, the previous one being vegan, and my daughter declaring "we like this one, he eats real food!" Anyway, to each their own and if they don't want their chicken, I'll take it. I eat less meat these days because a) it is too expensive and b) because frying up a steak splatters 50% of my tiny kitchen and I hate the clean up. Grilling might be better healthwise, but the griller is part of the oven and hard to get into for cleaning purposes. Is that a mini chainsaw in Pootie's hands?

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    1. It is indeed. Or, as he would put it, right-sized.

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  8. I gave veganism a serious try several years ago. I think we managed to stay true for about six months. I wanted to experience the benefits myself, to see what could be learned along the way. 1) I learned that there are a bunch of nasty-tasting faux meat products out there to avoid. My principles kicked in hard against those; they’re expensive and you might as well eat the real chicken if you can’t live without the taste. 2) Vegans have to chop themselves silly, cook constantly, and work like hell to make sure they get adequate nutrition. 3) It is possible to make tofu delicious, but it involves about 8 ingredients and some considerable planning ahead. 4) You will piss off almost anyone you eat out with, ALL of your extended family, and most waiters. In fact, you virtually stop eating out, which is a bummer. And forget being invited to dinner in someone’s home. I concluded that, until we all adopt it, going vegan is very hard work and too boring without parmesan.

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    1. Parmesan is pretty important to me too. I'm not sure it would be a big change for me, and I definitely wouldn't be trying faux meat or tofu. Just gobs of vegetables. (And parmesan.) Oh, and chicken. You know, that kind of vegan.

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    2. As one South American Vegan Comedian once said, the only thing he missed about becoming Vegan was FRIENDS! *Laughed my Ass off!*

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  9. I do all my grilling outside on a propane grill - no cleanup! It seems eggs for vaccines are not necessarily anti-vegan, if the chickens are kept in truly humane conditions and the eggs are (god forbid) unfertilized (I am for minimal roosters). Chickens are going to lay eggs whether you want them to do that or not, with roosters around, or not. So I guess vegans are for a (mostly) chicken-free planet since if they were left to natural selection, they would probably die out as a species. Too dumb to survive. And how do vegans justify the natural order of things, i.e.: "nature, red in tooth and claw"? Do they want to eliminate all predatory carnivores? They would have to give up their pet cats! I say, concentrate on eliminating the predator occupying the oval office. Better use of time and energy.

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    1. With you on that last bit at least. I don't know of any vegans who are advocating veganism in your standard carnivores!

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    2. Desert Rat you have my Vote for eliminating the predator occupying the oval office!

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  10. I have spent the last couple of days trying to dumb down my new tracfone. We are in a struggle. I want only to make and receive calls and texts. It somehow is producing my email without permission. It keeps asking for permission to do other things too. No, no, no. The struggle is real!

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  11. Love the photo. The bit of blur makes it look like a painting, and you are cradling those veggies like an infant. In fact, the whole composition is Madonna-like, if fleeting; the tender squashes don't know what's about to slice through them.

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  12. Pus-filled waste of carbon! Priceless!

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  13. Oh, noes! Not our hamberders! Next thing ya know, they'll be coming for our covfefe! And you said swan.

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  14. Well Written and Hilarious! I don't eat Meat for health reasons and found I didn't miss it, but I eat Seafood and made an exception for Bacon because there are no good fake Bacons! *LOL* My Diabetic Number responded so well that I had to confess that my prior Carnivorous ways must have been contributing to my ailing Pancreas... or something... The Adult Grandkids liked to tease me that getting Dreadlocks a few Years ago changed me into a Health Freak Person now... they could be Right? *Winks* And now of coarse all their Friends think I know where to get the Good Kush... talk about Stereotyping someone! *LMAO*

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  15. I have spent the last couple of days trying to dumb down my new tracfone. We are in a struggle. I want only to make and receive calls and texts. It somehow is producing my email without permission. It keeps asking for permission to do other things too. No, no, no. The struggle is real!custom swimsuits custom made swimsuits

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  16. OEM là gì: OEM (Original Equipment Manufacturer) hay còn gọi là nhà sản xuất thiết bị gốc. OEM thường được dùng để chỉ các công ty, công xưởng, doanh nghiệp thực hiện các công việc sản xuất theo bản vẽ thiết kế, thông số kỹ thuật được đặt trước rồi bán sản phẩm cho công ty khác
    Hàng OEM được hiểu là nhà sản xuất chế tạo ra một linh kiện nào đó trong một sản phẩm chung, sau đó họ sẽ phân phối đến nhà sản xuất phụ kiện tiếp theo của sản phẩm. Và hàng phân phối này sẽ mang thương hiệu của nhà sản xuất phân phối chứ không phải là hàng của nhà sản xuất đầu tiên nữa.
    Chính vì điều này mà các mặt hàng cung cấp theo kiểu OEM thường có giá thành rẻ hơn giá sỉ. Nhưng tiêu chí để nhà sản xuất thứ 2 muốn cung cấp theo dạng OEM này thì phải đảm bảo 2 điều:
    - Là phải đảm bảo số lượng mà nhà cung cấp thứ nhất đưa ra. Điều này nhằm đảm bảo doanh thu và đúng theo đơn đặt hàng của nhà sản xuất thứ nhất.
    - Nhà sản xuất thứ nhất không chấp nhận việc nhà sản xuất thứ 2 mang hàng OEM ra bán lẻ, mà phải đi làm chế tạo ra thành phẩm rồi mới được dùng vào mục đích bán lẻ.
    Graphic Design là gì: Graphic Design (hay còn gọi là thiết kế đồ họa) là nghệ thuật phối hợp các yếu tố hình ảnh, kiểu chữ nhằm truyền tải đi một thông điệp, ý nghĩa nào đó đến người xem.
    Graphic Designer (Designer/Chuyên viên thiết kế): đây là những người làm công việc thiết kế đồ họa, sử dụng các phần mềm chuyên dụng để thiết kế/sáng tạo nên những sản phẩm/tác phẩm thuộc nhiều ngành nghề khác nhau. Phụ thuộc vào tính chất & môi trường làm việc mà ta có thể phân loại thành:
    - Agency Graphic Designer: Designer làm việc cho các công ty chuyên thiết kế
    - In-house Graphic Designer: Designer làm việc cho các công ty sản xuất, kinh doanh dịch vụ
    - Freelance Graphic Designer: Designer nhận dự án làm việc tự do.
    Thế giới Graphic Design vô cùng phong phú và rộng lớn, đòi hỏi các designer phải có những kỹ năng chuyên môn khác nhau để tạo ra sản phẩm thiết kế phù hợp. Nhiều nhà thiết kế có khả năng hoạt động trên nhiều lĩnh vực nhưng cũng không ít người chỉ làm việc chuyên sâu với một loại hình duy nhất. Dưới đây loại hình chính của nghề Graphic Designer.
    CBM là gì: CBM là viết tắt của từ Cubic Meter, được dịch là đơn vị tính mét khối (m3), thường được sử dụng để đo đơn vị khối lượng trong vận chuyển hàng không, đường biển,… khi hàng hóa được đóng vào container.
    Nhà vận chuyển thường quy đổi trọng lượng kg sang cbm để áp dụng tính đơn giản vận chuyển, tùy thuộc vào độ nặng nhẹ của hàng hóa. Hay ngược lại nhà vận chuyển cũng có thể dễ dàng tính toán số lượng hàng cần thiết cho một container là bao nhiêu.
    Cbm xuất hiện rất nhiều trong lĩnh vực vận chuyển hàng hóa hay xuất nhập khẩu hàng hoá. Cbm sẽ được các công ty vận tải chuyên giao nhận hàng hóa sử dụng để tính khối lượng các mặt hàng, giúp người vận chuyển có thể đo lường sắp xếp vị trí hàng hóa trong container, trong khoang máy bay sao cho tốn ít không gian nhất, chở được nhiều hàng hóa nhất và rút ngắn thời gian vận chuyển. Cuối cùng để tính cước phí vận chuyển phù hợp với khối lượng hàng đã được bàn giao.

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