Saturday, September 15, 2012

And So Flaky, Too

It's pie season around here again and I'm gathering all my ingredients, but I usually run out of something. Flour, patience. You come up short a half cup of patience and it's liable to make all your pies damp, scabby and airborne. It probably doesn't help with the patience supply that it's election season, but unless I make all my pies in January of an odd-numbered year I'm just going to have to soldier on. I am writing this post in advance of actually putting the pies together, because afterwards I will be drinking strenuously, which affects my computer screen.

I bake all my pies and freeze them. Some people freeze them unbaked. I didn't know which was better so I Googled it. The first eight articles that came up contradicted each other. The only thing they all agree on is that the pies are good in the freezer for "up to four months." I have eaten pies that have been in the freezer for three years. They tasted great. Know why? They're pie. I am already pre-aggravated because I'm about to start making pie, and I find it aggravating that there's no consensus on this. If any of you have any great tips on freezing pies, keep them to yourself.

There are several pie crust recipes I've been known to use, the tastiest of which is Mary Ann's famous hazelnut crust, which I use exclusively for the huckleberry pies on account of their preciousness. It takes hours to pick enough fish-egg-sized berries for one pie in a good year, and this is not a good year. Mary Ann and I went up to the mountain to pick and ended up lurching across ravines and through stickery bush patches just because we thought we saw a bush with three berries on it the size of mouse eyes. We put in five hours and I think I'll have enough for a single pie if I don't filter out the fir needles, spiders, and deer poop. The good news is, that means I only need to roll out two hazelnut crusts this year. You can seriously run down your serenity stash with a hazelnut crust.

So, for the other pies, I've decided to go with good ol' Mom's pie crust recipe. It, at least, gets me in a good mood to begin with. It's typed on a yellowed piece of notebook paper and pasted into my recipe book. Mom typed five thousand words a minute and, most years, didn't get her first typo until mid-May. So there are no typos in this recipe. It's called "Foolproof Piecrust," which is more alarming to me than reassuring. With a mind for provenance, Mom typed at the top "From Woman's Day 11/74" and "Bobbie sent it to me." From this I conclude it isn't her original pie crust recipe from my childhood, but I won't know the difference, because I was a picky eater and never tried  her pie. I didn't think I'd like it because it didn't look like cake. When I finally ate Mom's apple pie as an adult, I wondered if a person could eat retroactive pie.

Foolproof Piecrust is made with vegetable shortening. So it's easier to make now because of one of the great modern inventions: Crisco in stick form. When I first started making pie, I'd have to come up with 3/4 cups shortening by filling a measuring cup with 1/4 cup water and blobbing in spoonfuls of Crisco  until the water comes up to the one-cup mark, then pouring out the water. This was how it was taught to me in Home Ec (for you young people, this is the course in which you learn how to make a gingham apron, a cheeseball, and how to apply makeup, but you still won't know how to make an ashtray or an end table). It results in slimy hands, watery shortening, and another slice out of your serenity, and it still won't be accurately measured. The Crisco sticks eliminate all that. They come in individual plastic tubs that will swirl around in the ocean for millions of years, but I never said I was a perfect liberal.

It also calls for a large egg. I have never seen a recipe that calls for any other size egg. And I never have known whether they want an egg graded Large or if they want a large egg. After all, there are Extra Large and Jumbo eggs, and those are really large. Today, it doesn't matter. I only have a Medium egg, so  in it goes. Already I am challenging the Foolproof part. And I resent it. Why should the success of my pies have to depend on the embouchure of a chicken sphincter?

The Foolproof Piecrust claims to make enough crust for 2-1/2 to 3 double-crust pies. Mom typed this at the bottom:

"Mommie's notes: I probably roll mine extra thin, but I get enough for five double-crust pies." Holy shit, Mom.

The only reason a person could successfully roll out and transfer pie crust thin enough to read the directions through is that that person is pure of heart and full of goodness. I'll never be able to do it. But thanks, Mom, for reminding me every year why I loved you so much.

September 7 would have been my mommy's 99th birthday. 

113 comments:

  1. Oh Murr. It is years since I have made a pie and you have reminded me why. Patience is never in the cupboards here and I cannot find it at the shops either. It seems to me it ought to be in the freezer section - but it isn't. I've looked.
    Apart from being tiny and a pain in the butt to collect what makes huckleberries special? And does their taste resemble any other berry?
    September 7 will be special to you forever won't it? Good thoughts are winging your way.

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    1. I think the really special part about huckleberries is the tiny and a pain in the butt to pick part. Also, they're tasty, I guess.

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  2. Google Mark Bittman's pie crust recipe and you won't have trouble with pie crust anymore, though your next post about pie making mightn't be so funny.

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    1. I can hardly believe it, but I think I've written about making pies three times before. It's a perennial. Every year I can think of new ways to curse it.

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  3. Patience reward is just patience...I have none. I used to make pies...I have about 20 pie plates that I would love to get rid of..i wish they still made Crisco the old way without the hydrogenated oil..Sounds like you have fond memories of your mom..that is a very good thing.

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    1. Huh. Crisco used to be something else? I don't care what is in it as long as it comes in a whackable stick with eternal plastic packaging.

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  4. From the berry expedition I knew this was going to be a good Murr morning. By the time I got to "Mommie's notes" the tears were sliding down. I knew you'd had a mommie "pure of heart and full of goodness." I could tell.

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    1. Oh, I did, I did. It took a lot to aggravate her. I did succeed in my teens, though.

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  5. THAT'S why I can't make pie crust worth a ....... I'm not pure of heart and full of goodness. Thank goodness Mr Tenderflake is in the grocery freezer. I can continue on with my evil ways and still produce a pie when required.

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    1. Yes, that is why. You know, I always knew there was a buyable pie crust out there, and somehow I can't bring myself to do the obvious thing. It would be like betraying my heritage, although I already betray my heritage with my use of expletives.

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  6. I don't make pie any more either. I did long ago when I had little kids who would eat it. Now there's only me and my significant other who also doesn't want the temptation around. But if your mom would have made it, I would have forced myself. :-)

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    1. See, that's where the freezing comes in. You have a few people over for dinner, and blammo, there's your dessert, and no leftovers unless you have a table full of gluten-freers. Which sometimes happens.

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  7. I never thought of freezing pies, Murr, and can never be bothered to make one just for the two of us. Suddenly I see a pie-baking session looming. Lovely post.

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    1. That is just what pie-baking sessions do. They loom. And glower.

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  8. I am more of a cake woman,myself.Pies have all that healthy fruit in them. Most of them that is. But I do love the left-over piecrust re-rolled, spread with butter and cinnamon sugar, and rolled up to bake into a sweet, crispy, buttery mass of empty calories and cholesterol.

    My Norwegian grandma, the lumber camp cook, used to say that bear lard made the best pie crusts. Unless it was one of those river bears that fattened up on spawned out salmon. But a good, high-country bear that spent the summer eating berries and roots and the occasional fresh chipmunk- Best piecrust in the world!

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    1. I was sailing through your first paragraph thinking "this woman is Norwegian" and you came through for me in the second. Uff da! If I had to kill me a b'ar to make a pie I might just take up cake-baking.

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  9. Sept 6th would have been my father's 79th birthday. I am off to you now ...

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    1. My mother makes rhubarb pies, which I don't recaLL eating.

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    2. And my mother made rhubarb pies, which I don't recall eating.

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    3. My mother made rhubarb pies with maple syrup glaze, and I ate a lot of them!

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  10. Holy cats! Your mom was Mamie Eisenhower?

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    1. Fie! (A) We were an Adlai Stevenson family, and (B) Mamie had bangs.

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  11. I used to make wonderful pies, and I always made one for Thanksgiving. Why don't I do it any more? Because Thanksgiving is not at my house, and I can't carry a pie on the train without breaking it.

    A large egg is a 2-ounce egg. If you buy different sizes, weigh a dozen and divide by 12 to figure out whether you need to adjust your recipe. (Our butcher used to sell eggs and put them on the scale to prove they were larger than large.)

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  12. I think all our moms were trying to channel Mamie Eisenhower back in the 50's! Pie is one of the few things I actually like to make. (Otherwise, I'm pretty much a disaster in the kitchen.) Nothing more frustrating, though, than a bad pie crust... when it goes awry, there's no fixing it. I'm very curious about the egg pie crust, now! And the hazelnut crust!

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    1. The hazelnut crust must be rolled between sheets of wax paper and transferred carefully. The degree of difficulty is high, and I don't always stick the landing.

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    2. Okay, here it is. You can substitute all purpose flour for whole wheat pastry flour if you've a mind to (although I never have):

      FOOLPROOF PIECRUST with Hazelnuts

      4 cups whole wheat pastry flour
      ½ Cup Ground Hazelnuts (you can just spin ½ cup of whole nuts in a food processor until ground)
      2 tsp salt
      1-3/4 cups unsalted Butter
      1/2 cup cold water
      1 T white or cider vinegar
      1 large egg
      If you want to do this in a food processor, you will need to divide the ingredients in half and make half a batch at a time – put in half of dry ingredients, mix, add butter in small chunks and process until crumbly. Mix up the water, vinegar, and egg in a separate bowl – measure half of that solution and slowly add it to the dry ingredients in the food processor while it is running until it comes together into a ball. Remove the first batch and repeat the process with the second.
      Non - processor mixing – In large bowl, stir together with fork the flour , nuts, and salt; cut in butter until crumbly.
      In small bowl, beat together water, vinegar and egg; add to flour mixture and stir until are ingredients are moistened. Will be sticky.
      Divide dough in 5 portions (or 6, if you will be rolling it thin) and shape each into a flat, round patty; wrap each in plastic or waxed paper and chill at least 1/2 hour.
      When ready to use, lightly flour both sides and roll on floured board. (I roll mine out between sheet of parchment paper with no additional flour needed.)
      Dough can be left in fridge for up to 3 days or frozen and thawed before use.

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    3. Well, there you go, Mary Ann's famous hazelnut pie crust, which is NOT named "Foolproof piecrust" in my version of the recipe! I wouldn't have shared it without permission, so this is good. If I'm not mistaken, MA made it all up herself, because she knows how things work. I do not, but I make up for it by eating everything no matter what.

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  13. Wow-this brought back memories of cooking with my mother, and of 4-H club cooking. And measuring shortening in water---what a nuisance. Now I cheat and buy nice crusts already made, rolled into tubes that just have to be brought to room temp and put in the pie plate. And esbboston---I live in the Atlanta, GA area, and when I mention rhubarb pies to people brought up here, they have never heard of rhubarb. "What is that?" they ask.

    And btw---I think Mr. Romney could retroactively eat pie.

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    1. Hahaha! Thanks- now I'm over the annoyance of a CAT climbing into the pantry and breaking 2 eggs - all before my first cup o' joe.

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  14. "pre-aggravated" and "retroactive pie" = my day is made. I didn't make my first pie til just a few years ago. The inspiration was seeing the look on my then-almost-husband's face as he took a bite of strawberry rhubarb pie. He looked so happy, and was consequently so beautiful, that I realized that's why I had incarnated into this lifetime: to see that look on his face. Unfortunately, my pies still resemble baked cow shit. Practice, I guess.

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    1. Put enough pie in him, you'll see a whole different kind of beauty, in the "more of him to love" vein.

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  15. See, if you used a 2 cup measuring cup with 1 1/4 cups of water in it, it would be SO much easier to measure that 3/4 cup of shortening. I didn't learn that in Home Ec...I figured it out in my own kitchen the first time I was in charge of baking the Thanksgiving pie alone. My grandmother used lard, too, and it came in a block with markings on the wrapper, just like a stick of butter does. So no measuring was required.

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    1. That actually occurred to me as I was typing it, but not ONCE when I was doing it. Of course, I didn't have a 2-cup measure at the time.

      My mom also used bacon fat. Not in pies, I think, but in cookies for sure.

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    2. It's far easier to scoop Crisco out of the can with a measuring spoon and level it off. 1/2 cup = 8 tablespoons. (I love to make pies but I like even better to eat pies.)

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  16. 3 medium eggs equal 2 large in recipes. But I can't help you figure out what half an egg is.

    I buy pie at Harris Teeter. I highly recommend the apple.

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    1. Interesting thing about apple pie. It's nearly my favorite, but I won't eat even a bite if there's any nutmeg in it.

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  17. What a lovely combination of humor and tribute. We who had moms like that are so lucky.

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  18. Oooh, I want retroactive pie!

    It never occurred to me to make pies in advance and freeze them - it sounds like a good idea in theory, but they'd probably get beaten to crumbs with all the other stuff in my freezer.

    Mmmm. Now I want pie...

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    1. Naw. Once you freeze it, it's a boulder, and you can stack 'em high.

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  19. My mom never made pies. Cakes and cookies were the thing in my family. I remember trying it a couple times as a young woman...and not doing well with it--LOL! If you can make pies, you are Wonder Woman in my book! ;)

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    1. Is there a SuperCrab hero?

      I do look an awful lot like Wonder Woman in Spandex. No wait, it's the Michelin Man.

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  20. That picture of you and your mom just makes me smile!

    I loved the part on Home Ec versus Shop. So true.

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    1. Don't you wish you'd learned something useful? Although sewing is useful. I did not learn how to cook.

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  21. Five pies! I'll bet your mom could have done well at brain surgery too.

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  22. simon Nicol - me again...September 15, 2012 at 11:20 AM

    Coincidentally, and as Bill Bryson would say, "Notes from a small island".

    http://www.lep.co.uk/news/local/woman-burns-pie-1-60732

    Love the show, by the way...

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    1. She burnt the pie because she was too elderly to tie it to a horse and have it drug through town.

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  23. "They tasted great. Know why? They're pie."
    Truer words were never spoken. Except all the OTHER words in this post. Lemon meringue is my favorite, to make and to eat (and to spell, for that matter)- not that anybody asked...

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    1. I truly hate lemon meringue pie. If I go to someone's house and they serve lemon meringue pie and my politeness gene kicks in, I'm very unhappy to have ingested all those calories I didn't like.

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    2. Each chicken should receive a medal for extruding a medium egg, and IV morphine for large and above.

      I pray not to remember the sphincter embouchure during a dog-walk. Already I thank the dog for his lovely parting gift, or the gift with purchase. Neighbors need no additional reasons to shun me.

      LMP! That loathesome nemesis, a shorthand description for acute disappointment. At a turgid law-firm interview lunch (many moons ago), the partner insisted that I order the LMP. I smiled at him, then at the waiter, and enunciated carefully "chocolate cake". So adult, so empowered. So surprised when waiter plopped down LEMON MERINGUE PIE. Crash crash crash. Which I did not eat: bastards.

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    3. I remember the days when we didn't have to wrap the dog's parting gifts. Now we do. I don't have a dog now.

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  24. What a funny post:) My mom could make a five pound meatloaf out of one pound of hamburger!

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    1. There you go--my favorite meal, and the only thing I use ketchup on. I have Dave make me one for my birthday.

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  25. Replies
    1. aw.

      Mommy died at 68, and on her last birthday she pleasantly declined to open her presents, because she said it wasn't her birthday. We got her to open them by telling her we had to go back to school and couldn't be here on her REAL birthday.

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    2. Aren't Mommies great? Where would I be without one ?

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  26. Huh? My mom--who would have been 96 on September 7--taught me to use a spatula to press Crisco directly into the measuring cup. No messing around with water. Had I taken Home Ec I'd have had a big conflict, I guess.

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    1. Yuh, I've tried it that way too. Basically, Crisco is a path to sorrow.

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  27. Love your posts and this one made me smile ....and want pie ....you do look alittle stressed though but I hope you were chilled when they were all in the freezer.

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  28. So, will you share your Mom's recipe? Personally, I cheat. I use Betty Crocker pie crust mix. You just add 1/3 cup of cold water. It makes a nice crust. The only thing you have to fuss with is rolling it out. One of these years I'm going to work on making crust from scratch. After I get the closets cleaned out.

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    1. It's nothing special, except that it's probably not as fussy as some.

      4 cups flour
      1 T sugar
      2 tsp salt

      Cut in 1-3/4 cup shortening

      Mix together and add:
      1/2 cup water
      1 T white or cider vinegar
      1 LARGE egg

      Divide into portions and refrigerate until cold, then roll out.

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    2. What's with the vinegar and egg? Never heard of those in pie crust recipes. A little sugar sprinkled on your pastry cloth (yet another tip!) will help make rolling out that tricky dough a little easier.

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  29. First off, what have you got against nutmeg? Second, what have you got against lemon meringue? Personally, I prefer Key Lime to the lemon.

    It was my Grandmother (born in 1898) who made a superior pie: apple, peach, cherry, blueberry, but never rhubarb. I watched her make crusts hundreds of times growing up. Light, flaky, delicious!

    I wish I could go back in time and videotape her cooking. Unfortunately, she NEVER measured anything, so it wouldn't have helped. I remember her telling me that it was all in how it felt when the crisco, flour, and a pinch of salt or sugar came together. Maybe she added a splash of water before she wrapped it in wax paper and put it in the fridge while we cut the fruit?

    I can recall exactly how wonderful those pies tasted; trouble is, I can't recall how that perfect dough felt in my hand as I helped her roll it out! Elaine M.

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    1. Got nothin' aginst--'cept'n' I don't like nutmeg. I don't like lemon meringue. I don't like meringue. Your grandma (born 1882) knew what she was doing. People useter.

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  30. September 7th! My birthday too!

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    1. Oh I must have known that once! Now I'll never forget. Happy birthday, Tom.

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  31. I've never made pie, it scares me. Pie does not exist in Germany. If go to to Google translator and try to translate "pie" it will give you the German word for "cake."

    However, your post reminded me that I have an Edwards chocolate pie in the fridge. So I'm eating that now, probably getting crumbs into the keyboard.

    That retroactive thing...that goes for wine, too, doesn't it?

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    1. Yes it does. And it has hardly any calories because you've had your whole life to absorb them.

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  32. You hit alll the bases and more on this one, Murr. Made me laugh out loud at 'embouchure of a chicken sphincter', and made me tear up a little at the end. And, I haven't thought of home ec in so long! That seems like a million years ago!

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  33. I can remember my mother making pies. She made her own pie crusts and would sprinkle flour in the pie tin before placing the crust into it. She said it made it come out easier when sliced. The extra pie crust she would place onto a baking sheet, spread butter on it and sprinkle with a mixture of sugar and cinnamon. Then she sliced and baked. We called them cinnamon sticks. Mmmmmm!

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    1. I should do that thing with the extra trimmings, but instead I don't trim and bunch it all up around the pie. Never have taken one to the county fair, though.

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  34. My Nana said certain people are born with pie fingers and others just aren't. She had 'em; I don't. My mother-in-law made the best pies on the planet. Her son can't. So we're a feckless, pieless lot in this house. And I do love a good fruit pie. Gosh knows we've tried, the two of us, but if you threw our pies out of a plane, you could destroy cities with them.

    Up in these parts, Crisco comes in butter-like blocks all conveniently marked off in 1/4,1/2 and 1 cup segments.

    My jaw hit the keyboard at 5 double crust pies out of one recipe. (see the bit about pies being used as weaponry above)

    The chicken sphincter bit reminded me of a letter a friend wrote to me once where he described a person's lips "as sensual as a hen's ovipositor". I've never forgotten that line. I don't think he was pie eyed when he wrote it.

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    1. See, he would have had me at "hen's ovipositor."

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  35. So, let me see if I get this right. During pie-making season, you (can) get a bit crusty? I can understand that. I'm not a master baker, or pie-maker, or whatever. All I know is pie are round and cake are squared.

    Once again, you have done a masterful job of egging us on.

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    1. Stop! Now! I'll bet you're at least a little bit of a master baker.

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  36. Used to be, there were diners that had huge pieces of pie under glass - and I always thought the lemon meringue looked most impressive. I envy you, that you have ever gone to someone's house where they served you lemon meringue - can't say that's ever happened to me. I'm still fascinated that one can separate eggs and make a lemon custard with one part, and toasted white mountainous foam with the other. And I'm rather stunned that there's a pie you hate!

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    1. As far as I'm concerned, you can't make a custard with one part and foam with the other. Too many degrees of difficulty. If I tried it I'd have to rename it Sludge Under Glass.

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  37. Pie - my favorite meal! The only dessert I allow myself because it is a way of eating fruit, so it is healthy!
    People claim to love my pies... they always ask for seconds or if I would bake one for this or that occasion... I always smile when they ask for my crust recipe, tell 'em it is a family secret. Just don't tell them my family is Pet Ritz!
    Oh what I would not give for a bucket of real huckleberries once again! (wiping up drool)

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    1. Huckleberries come in BUCKETS?
      I know pie is good for you. Also, beer is an excellent source of whole grain goodness.

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  38. This is one of the best posts I've ever read in my life. And that's saying something. Damn, now I want pie.

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    1. Honey, I think you're reading with your taste buds!

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  39. I much prefer a tart, mostly because I can mash the crust into the bottom of a pan like an angry toddler and glop all sorts of goodness on top and bake it and it looks like it was in some way difficult. Most of my pie experiences have been frought with profanity, though not nearly to the degree that phyllo pastry has. I do believe phyllo is Greek for 'f*ck this'.

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    1. Myself, I make a mean baklava, or maybe that's what I wear. In any case, I gravitate toward any recipe that's called a "crumble."

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  40. Hey Murr! You has me at PIE. Mmmm, pie. And yes, my mum makes awesome pies. Ooooh, rhubarb. Indigo x

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    1. Aw, you have a Mum! That's so very foreign of you!

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  41. I've never made a good crust, so I've told my family that crust is not to be eaten; it's just the conveyance structure for the filling. Now, I'm getting so lazy, I skip the crust and just put brown sugar and flour crumbles on top.

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    1. I can't even make the claim of a good conveyance structure. I've got holes in my chassis.

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  42. Murr, you do make me laugh -- and remember. My Mom made pies and cakes and cookies -- like all good moms' of the 1950's! When she made her pie crust she never measured the Crisco! Imagine my relief when she decided that pie crust that came already rolled and ready for plopping into the pie dish was as good as you can make! Now I have no problem making pies -- and no guilt that I'm not doing it Mom's way... When we are in France I have a problem though. You can buy all kinds of crust already rolled out -- but which one should I have: brisee, sable, feuillete? Back in England life is much simpler -- though now I see they've snuck in addition to 'puff' and 'short' they've added 'butter'... oh the problems of the modern cheatin' baker!

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    1. Choice. It's the enemy of serenity. (The other one, besides pie.)

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  43. Parenting advice I was not expecting. Wonderfully effective it was. Thank you for that. I will let you know how our first family pie crust turns out.

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    1. Geoff! You need to be pure of heart. Are you sure you want to try this?

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  44. I do the pie here too. And haven't gotten beyond the Pillsburry crust. My mom wouldn't have approved of that. Still she used lard and that's a banned subtance in this house acorrding to the chloreterol policewoman. Oh well we soldier on too...:)

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    1. I initially read your comment as "we solder on too..." and I thought: genius! Solder that sucker together.

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    2. Troutbirder, lard really does make for a nice crust!

      Murr, Snort!

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  45. Absolutely one of your best. Love to come here for therapy. Just don't understand, though: if Mittens can retire retroactively from Bain, why can't you eat a retroactive pie?

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    1. Why, I believe you've just proven we can!

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  46. Just poped back to explain what a woywwer is.Just over 3 years ago a lady called Julia who has a blog called Stamping Ground asked if a small group of us who posted on her blog, would like to meet every Wednesday on the net to show what we were up to on our crafting desk. 10 soon became 20 and it just grew and spread over the world. The idea is that you visit everyone and leave a comment ...which was easy up to 50 ish but now there are nearly 200 each week and a people pool of nearly 250+ if everyone joined in every week. Are we mad ...yes ....but some have met up and made friends ...others you feel are friends you can unburden problems on by email. Originally we were papercrafters, mainly card makers and scrappers ....now it covers all paper arts , artists,seamstress'with a difference,knitters ...if one is creative one is welcome ...and you dont need a desk to show off ....some craft from a sofa or the floor....some even have studios. The initials stand for Whats On Your Workspace Wednesday...so some one who joins in I call a woywwer.....sorry this ended up a rather long explanation. xx Love reading all the replies you give ...must jot down some of the recipes too.

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    1. What's On Your Workspace Wednesday! Aha! Well, I'll tell you, whatever is on my workspace Wednesday is the same thing that was on it five months ago. That's a LOT of blogs to visit, dear, and I'm doubly honored you tripped into mine.

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  47. Murrmurrs, so sorry that your Mommy is gone. I thankfully still have mine, but it was touch and go last year when she battled breast cancer. Now I have moved far away from her and miss her more than I ever have in my life. I feel the fragility of it all. And the irony. I have spent most of my 55 years trying to get away from her. Now I just want to be near her. Go figure! I'd bet you'd take yours back in heartbeat now! I love this cooking connection. I hope your pies turned out well. I wouldn't be surprised if they were salted with a few tears though! A few of mine are splashing on the keyboard right now!

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    1. I don't know if it's true that the people who are crazy about their parents lose them early, and the people whose parents make them crazy have them forever. But I was probably irked at my mom for maybe a half-hour in my teens, and that was that. She had breast cancer, too; died over thirty years ago.

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  48. You and your superior crusts have cut to the quick of me. How I have labored over pie crusts and their recipes; how I have interviewed farm wife after farm wife and sent up a Hosannah to my born-in-a-sod-house Montana grandmother. But still.

    Not great crust.

    The one thing getting me through is the fact that my great-aunt (Ye Old My Grandma's Sister) is 94 and alive and kicking up dust in Cody, Wyoming.

    And she keeps her peach pie in the freezer, just awaiting my random stop-by. It's only an 18-hour-drive or so. Worth the trip.

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    1. Not MY superior crusts! Mine are ever-shifting tectonic wonders. I'm happy if I can just get one to keep my berries mostly ganged up, with just a few escapees.

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  49. This has likely been said already, and more eloquently, but your expressions are priceless.

    And you made me hungry, too. Double-whammy.

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  50. Don't know about the pie, but loved your post!!
    Right now I'm laughing so hard that my husband thinks I've gone completely off my rocker and tears are running down my face and puddling on my tummy!!! Oh my, what I would give to have someone laugh so much at my words of wisdom. I've been trying for 77 years and still haven't pulled it off! Keep up the good work, I'll be checking back with you.
    Hope your week-end is going well, hugs, Maki

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