Marching Ass To War!

 

Don't celebrate just yet.

We have been the victims of an intricate and ingenious plot, and as a consumer of the social media, I have done the research.

It's been a sting operation all along, folks, and we Biden voters have fallen for it hook, line, and thinker. Everything that has happened has all been part of the Plan. To wit:

President Trump made a deal with the Kodak company to add a non-radioactive isotope watermark to each ballot that cannot be replicated. It will be very easy to separate illegitimate votes, and the criminals will be exposed and brought before a military tribunal. Then, ideally, they will be lined up and shot. [Advance ticket sales begin Thursday, and a lucky few who contribute to the RNC in six figures will be entered into a lottery for a chance to mow down suspected Democrats from a skybox.]

Illegitimate voters would include the dead, and the thousands upon thousands of voters who moved to a different house at some point, plus the millions of duplicate ballots that have been dumped into the system by the Democrat Cabal, whose voters are all in on the scheme, thanks to the instructions from the brain chips Bill Gates installed via vaccination.

In Arizona, election officials are known to have passed out Sharpies instead of ballpoints, which invalidates the ballots. Sharpies are to be used only by the Executive Branch for bill-signing, personal notes, and weather maps. Arizona election officials insist they have provided only allowable writing implements, a flat lie that is belied by the steep rise in the graph of number of tweets about Sharpiegate (zero to 350,000 in 24 hours).

 

A sophisticated Plan has been in the works for three years, and the faithful are implored to worry not, and trust that in the next few days the Plan will continue to play out--that everything that has happened has been flawlessly executed, and they will soon see the results clearly. The godly Trump forces have, in fact, lured the enemy "countless times into traps when they thought we were losing," and inasmuch as the President just lost big--or so it seems--imagine how big the trap must be! Hee hee! It's all part of the Art of War. In fact the midterms, when the R's lost the House but kept the Senate, were part of the Plan also; they needed the Senate, but in the House they exposed the crimes of the enemy through impeachment and the withholding of pandemic relief. Not that we need pandemic relief because we've rounded the corner, but still.

 

Lizard people may also be involved. Reptilian humanoids among us originally came from the constellation Draco. They can be identified by, among other things, smiles that display the bottom teeth. That's why the face masks. Inasmuch as Draco is composed of stars as much as 330 light-years apart, a mighty vast territory, we can see just how huge and devilish an enterprise this has been. They have been manipulating the human DNA for much of history, which also explains how humans have reptilian genetics within their brains. Up till now that has been a mystery, inasmuch as we were originally created in God's image on the morning of the sixth day.

Anyway reptilian humanoids bent on world domination have infiltrated the Deep State and should be suspected of massive vote manipulation if only to distract us from their pizza-fueled child sex orgies.

But never fear. All this was foreseen. The ongoing flow of prayers has activated God's mighty army, which has descended upon our great nation in spectacular force.

Well, Democrats, this would be worrisome indeed, but we too must keep the faith! We have our own sting operation involving radioactive isotope watermarks on Republican ballots, which should bear fruit in the form of two-headed babies and Satanic birthmarks twenty or so years down the line. At that point we can easily round up the perpetrators of the climate disaster, and guilty parties will be marched before a tribunal of achingly earnest liberals who will scold them with really big words and wagging fingers.

Meanwhile, it is uncertain if God's mighty army is in the form of the fat dudes in flag underpants and military gear, but they will prove to be no match to the lurching army of zombies we have recruited to pump up the vote tally.

Just Another Wednesday

This post is set to go off at 3am the day after the election. I have every expectation that it will. I'll be asleep but it will happen anyway. There's always something technical that might gum up the works, but new days in general have a way of showing up on schedule. It's something you can count on.

I don't know what will have transpired last night. It's possible nobody knows for sure, even now. This is normal. It's important to know what you don't know. It's one of the hallmarks of a thoughtful mind. The cocksure are always missing something. The cocksure know everything all along, but it doesn't make them right.

I think most of us voters are driven by fear. It's a powerful motivator. The main difference between the two major American factions is what we fear. The faction I don't tend to vote with is afraid of a lot of things. In my view, most of those things don't exist. They are phantoms produced in the Devil's workshop to divert us from what we really should fear, to harvest our votes for the purpose of further siphoning off our wealth. Thus, the desperate refugee from violence is transformed into a murderous threat. Thus, a righteous movement of patriots marching for justice is transformed into roving bands of thugs. Thus, an attempt to claw back a share of our stolen treasure for the common good is transformed into the Socialist bogeyman, out to pick our pockets. These are the fictions manufactured by the real thieves. The fat cats. The wicked and criminally negligent destroyers of our future.

This faction has been conditioned to be afraid of The Other, and The Other has been defined so broadly it even includes me. A small, mouthy, entirely harmless human, still I am declared an enemy. I have repeatedly been declared an enemy by the president of the United States. I, and a solid majority of my fellow citizens, have been deemed unworthy of protection or even consideration. United we used to stand, but divided we elect Republicans. We're divided. Have we done it again?

I fear that our trust in our civilizing institutions, from the courts to the press, has been so degraded that we will crumble into gang warfare, featuring executions in the street and terrorist acts from all corners, with the heavily armed right-wing players the more dangerous by far.

What I fear more than anything is that we will miss our last chance to pull out of the death-spiral that is our devotion to fossil fuels. We may well have missed it already; we've wasted four precious years on top of another twenty years purchased by the Koch brothers, which they've blown on toys and party favors for their friends. Cheap energy has turned us into stumbling drunks, with decision-making abilities to match.

No matter what kind of world I've woken up to today, my path is clear. I must try hard to live up to my ideals to push my party where it needs to go, and resist the other party with all I can muster, and work for justice always, and do it peacefully. I once thought my political counterparts' brains had been scooped out and replaced by pudding. Of late I realize that pudding has been packed with nails and shards of glass. But I must remember to be kind. Kindness moves more hearts than belligerence. It's not easy. It will take stamina. But if we didn't have stamina, we'd be long gone by now.

I know we can't fight terror with terror. Not if we want to prevail.

Feeling Blue

So, it was snowing. There wasn't any way anyone could have predicted this, and maybe it was really fluffy rain, or possibly a Democrat hoax to make the weathermen look bad.

At any rate, whatever it was doing, it didn't look like anything I wanted to walk around in. The Hoax People say I shouldn't be walking around anyway. We've got enough food for a while if we're not too precious about the quality of it. We're probably going to find out what those mystery packages in the freezer are. Two of them are sort of yellow and we can't offhand remember any yellow meals we had that we liked.

It's been a weird few days. Not long ago I thought we'd finally gotten Joe Biden off our shoes but he has bounced back in a big way. I had thought Elizabeth Warren would have appealed to a lot of people who were torn between Biden and Bernie but evidently her voice is too high and she is too forthcoming about her plans. Bernie is much better about having the same ideas but not getting into the weeds with answering questions, and Biden is much better about saying things like Now is the time and We must move forward ahead together by cracky. I was terribly disappointed about Warren and slumped for a few days like a hypochondriac in a pandemic, but I've recovered.

And that is because I finally realized it isn't all that important who our figurehead is. We have had a real fine group running for office and many more already elected who are doing good and brave things. Anyone who thinks the parties are all alike at this point would have trouble deciding between a pillow-top mattress and a hill of fire ants.

Oh boy

So what we have now is a team. With a lot of all-stars on it. Biden himself, I recall, impressed me a good deal in one of the debates in 2008. And he is by most accounts a decent guy. It is not the worst thing in the world that he is too moderate for me. And that is because of the other thing I realized: if I had gotten my dream candidate in there, she wouldn't have been able to get the things done she wants to do. She could move things in the right direction, but she would face virulent and massively-funded opposition. Same thing with Bernie. There is no Democratic Socialist fairy. But there is the power of our numbers and our fervor, if we quit sulking and use it.

Those are our marching orders now. If Biden is our candidate, we get in there and let all our representatives know we support them when they fight the plutocracy and their hired vermin in Congress. Let them know we have their backs. The platform of the Democratic Party has not yet been assembled. Pick a plank and grab a hammer.

And if you are one of those idealists who is crowing about how you'll leave your ballot blank if you don't get your man? I'm going to guess you're a child. A white child, with no personal skin in the game, who is in a position to ride out someone else's storm.

I know how dismissive this is, and I happen to agree that Boomers have made a hash of things and deserve your derision (although you'd have been the same way)--but there is something that old people have earned just by staying alive, and that is perspective. We've seen this show before. We were idealistic too. We haven't given up our ideals, either, but we understand it takes longer and more sustained work than one just election. We'd like to keep all the fossil fuels in the ground starting yesterday too, but it's not going to happen merely by winning the vote. If there's any hope for it at all, it's going to happen by some cataclysm out of our control that will--much later--be seen as a blessing. A virus that shuts down commerce and transportation. A mass famine. A small asteroid.

But that doesn't mean it doesn't matter what we do. Try to imagine where we'd be if Gore had won in 2000. We wouldn't have started a war in the Middle East. We would have started to turn the climate ship around. The billionaires would have done their damnedest to prevent us, and we wouldn't have gotten enough done, but we'd be a lot further ahead. This is no time for petulance. Hold your nose if you must but vote for the Democratic candidate for President. Don't think of it as voting for some old fart. Think of it as voting for Biden Bernie Warren Harris Buttigieg Yang Abrams Inslee and Klobuchar. It's a damn fine group.